Friday, March 25, 2005


That is why I am here, and not packing, LOL. Now is the time for me to really dig into it and get stuff packed; we will be leaving here by Wednesday night, so less than a week to go. I have done some things, like the linen closet in the bathroom, and I just dug through my cabinet of assorted plastic what-not in the kitchen (you know, those yogurt/margarine/Cool Whip containers that seem so useful you just can't throw them out? Plus all the mis-matched lids, lol). I packed 2 more bookshelves, some more board games, all the plastic sippy cups and plastic pitchers. It sounds so good, and yet there is more to do! And so, of course, here I sit :-) I did pick up some file boxes to pack away what is in the file cabinets. It would be easiest to leave the papers in them, but then they would be way too heavy to move. Darn.

Today is Chris' last day of work in the local office. He has next week off for the move, and then he starts work in the new office. He is a little excited, but nervous too. He will have support staff, which he does not have now, but he knows the boss he has up here is waaaay better than the one down there. So I guess it will be a trade-off. He is hoping that at least he won't have to be working the amount of overtime he has been doing the past two weeks, because he will have others to pass the work on to.

I just wanted to make a brief comment on a current news item. I am taking a risk here, as I see that others who have written about it are getting nasty comments about it; I hope that doesn't happen to me. I don't think I have such a large audience, and since most who read here are friends of mine, you will all be nice to me :-) Ok, so here goes. First of all, I am wondering just where the heck anyone got the idea that it is a fundamental human right to choose how we die? It was my impression that MOST of us *do not* get to choose at all. I can tell you emphatically, my mother would NEVER have chosen to go as she did. Her two biggest fears in life were throwing up and drowning. She spent the last 3 months of her life doing just that. But she never ever considered it unfair, that she should have been given the option to die some other way. What she wanted was the option to NOT DIE. Next, I have serious doubts about the whole "following someone's wishes" issue when it comes to predicting how you would want to die in some nebulous future, telling someone else, and that someone else carrying that out for you when you can no longer convey what you want. NO ONE at 20 years old is going to say "Gee, I sure hope that someday I get in an accident or have an illness that causes me to be severely disabled, so I can sit in a bed the rest of my life and be a burden to others!" Duh. None of us wants to live that way, and looking at it from the perspective of a healthy active person, it seems like torture and the complete opposite of personal dignity. I have also read stories of people who have had such accidents befall them, and they sink into severe depression and really really really wish they were dead instead of having to live the way fate decreed. But I have also read many many stories where people such as these eventually learn to accept their situation and go beyond that to find meaning in their life even with the new restrictions. They learn that there is more to life than physical strength and agility. Yes, a certain well-known person would not be able to live the life she had planned for herself at 20 (again, who of US is living the life we planned at 20?). She claimed at that immature point in her life that she would never want to live this way. But who can say she has not changed her mind?

I admit, I can only go by what I read or hear, which is filtered through the opinions of the sources who put the information out. I am also very biased, as I am NOT an athiest but a Christian, and believe that God is in control and we are very poor judges when it comes to knowing what will really make us happy, and how to run our lives. Evidence seems to point to the fact that it is a certain well-known someone's *husband* who does not want her to live like this. He seems to resent the burden she is to him, and has gone on with his life without her, and pretty much neglects her. Just why won't he divorce her and let her parents take care of her? Some have suggested that he wants her to die so he can get the insurance. I have no idea; I don't know these people. But I can't figure out why he won't let the parents take her if he doesn't want her anymore.

And finally, I agree with the general consensus at The Big Yellow House, who agrees with some other bloggers, that the way they are letting this poor woman die is just cruel and inhumane. People would be shocked and outraged if I let my rabbit starve and dehydrate, yet doing it to this poor woman, who MAY NOT WANT TO DIE AFTER ALL, is ok? It just doesn't make sense to me. I don't believe in mercy killing anyway, and it isn't even drastic measures keeping this woman alive, just a feeding tube. Yes, she doesn't have much of a life at this point, (but it seems that may be more of her husband's fault than hers) but I think those who would see her die "compassionately" are looking at it with their own emotions, thinking "wow, *I* would never want to live like that, so she must not want to either." Maybe instead of asking able-bodied active people to decide that question for her, we should be asking others in similar situations. Ask those who *did* have a debilitating accident or illness and are now bedridden if *they* think she should be killed. You know what, I think if she really *did* want to die, she would have by now. It seems her husband gave her enough chances to do that. An accusation, I know, and I certainly have no proof. It just seems a shame that the country would rather find out after she is dead that her husband was the one who really wanted her dead.

Ok, that is my little rant. I carefully omitted her name so I won't come up on any searches of her particular case. I don't need strangers leaving me nasty comments.

Oops, that was more than a brief comment!

Come to think of it, it won't matter if they do, because I won't be here to read them, LOL. This is probably my last post before packing up the computer to move. I just have too much to do to now to have the time to sit down and procrastinate any more! See you in a few weeks!

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

Why Am I Even Considering It?

I know I don't want to go, it would never be worth the money, and there isn't enough time in the world for me to lose enough weight to show my face there, but... my high school 20th reunion is next fall. I was never really good friends with most of the people in my class; I had 2 best friends, and everyone else pretty much had a face and a name. I never really fit in there, not a true nerd and not an athlete, and not a pot-head either. I did pretty well with grades, but wasn't the top in my class. I wasn't really smart or popular or pretty or anything outstanding. I'm sure most of my classmates would remember me, but only because how many red headed twins do you know?

My high school was in New Jersey, and boy is it hard to go back there. It is soooo expensive. I guess if you never left you'd be used to it, but I moved away right after graduation (literally - I stayed a week at my grandma's house while the movers packed up our stuff and left, the day after graduation) and it seems so crowded and snooty now. I miss my town the way it used to be, but it won't ever be that again. So what would going to the reunion serve? And now that I don't have any family living in that area anymore, I have nowhere to stay either.

I googled some of my classmates, and it seems that some of them have done very well for themselves. I am impressed with their success. I wouldn't say I would be embarrassed to show up to be compared to them; after all, who else has 6 boys? LOL But I sure don't have anything to brag about. I didn't go to my 10th reunion, but it seemed like that was all about bragging. Maybe everyone is older and wiser now? I think I would actually consider going, just out of curiosity, if only I were 50 lbs lighter....

Chris' reunion was last year, and I really hate it that we missed that one. Unfortunately I was 8.5 months pg at the time and he just really didn't like the idea of my dropping the baby right there on the dinner table LOL. THAT sure would have been memorable! LOL Too bad it wasn't this year instead; with our move next week we will be very near his old hometown, and we could have attended, even pg. Oh well.

I hope that the reunion organizers for my class at least put up a website with pictures afterwards, so I can check and see what happened to everyone.

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

Second Verse Same As The First

A Little Bit Louder, And A Little Bit Worse

More bickering, more school work hysterics, only today included tooth marks in someone's arm and bloodshed (surprisingly not by my hand lol) and to top it off, because God needed a good laugh today, at 6 pm I discovered we are out of heating oil, and so have no heat tonight. We just had 200 gallons delivered less than 6 weeks ago, I have no idea where all that oil went. We suspect that maybe someone came and siphoned out some of our oil. Brrrr.

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Bad Mommy

Today I have been a bad mommy. I am going to have to moderate myself somewhat when we move, as the neighbors will be much closer and be able to hear my screaming, lol. It seems that I could get absolutely nothing done today without screaming at my boys. I have a headache and my voice is rough. So much of what goes on is minor, but it just builds and builds until I can't take it. The 4 yo and 2 yo are fighting over who can sit closer to the baby, who is on my lap, while I am on the phone with the realtor. The 2 yo is carrying a box of Chocolate Lucky Charms around the house, leaving a trail like Hansel and Gretel (does that make me the witch? LOL) He also carried around 5 different pieces of cold pizza from dinner last night, all of which now have one or two bites out of them, and are now residing in different rooms in the house. The 8 yo very nicely brought me his school work and we worked on it together, but this made the 10 yo jealous and he turned on the tv (forbidden before all school work is finished). The 4 yo complained that he was hungry 2 hours after breakfast, and whined when he couldn't have more cereal. ALL of them complained when their play date got scheduled for tomorrow instead of this afternoon. The 10 yo had sudden brain fade and couldn't for the life of him figure out fractions, which he has been doing for a while now. Somewhere in this frenzy I had to get a shower, wash dishes, and get more laundry done, plus make some phone calls related to moving details. So I ended up blowing my top and screaming at them. They had just pushed me too far and I lost it. I went through the house just yelling NO NO NO NO over and over again, LOL. "But Mommy..." NO! "But I want ..." NO! "But you said..." NO! and a few NOs to hands moving towards yet another piece of pizza LOL. Things are a little more settled now, and the boys are behaving more cautiously, but I still have that headache.

Thursday, March 03, 2005

Levi's 6 month portraits

I took Levi out and had his 6 month pictures done today. He's such a cutie!

It was so hard to get him to smile, which was weird, as he smiles all the time at home.

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

We Got It!

Our offer was accepted! We have a house! We don't need to live out of the van! LOL Phew, it's almost over. Now to pack everything and get out of here. We are going to see what we can do about getting in a few days early so our stuff doesn't have to sit in a truck for a week. Officially our closing date on the house is April 1, so 4 weeks to go and counting!

Another Offer Submitted

We decided to go for the gold house. Really the only things wrong with it are the color (it is vinyl siding, so not that easy to paint) and the very small back yard. These are things I can live with, but Chris is very disappointed about the yard. He says it is not even big enough to put in a garden. I disagree, I think he could take the sunny corner and do very well; besides that, he can put some energy into doing flowers and other landscaping (maybe detract from the siding color LOL). It is also just around the corner from the community center, so he can just come home and take the boys down the street and play ball or whatever (hmm, a win-win for both of us there!) So the offer goes in today, cross your fingers!

Levi's 2 top teeth have come in, so now he's up to 4. He likes to use them, too. Ouch! He has gotten much more hungry lately too, and has been trying to eat me, so I decided to finally go out and get him his own food. Last night he had his first official dinner, a bowl of baby rice cereal mixed with applesauce. He's been getting tastes of mashed potatoes and yogurt for a week or two, but last night was the first real meal he's had. He was a pig and ate it all! This morning he was begging for more for breakfast. I am not used to the baby getting so excited for food so quickly. With the others it took a few weeks for them to get used to the texture and the process of moving food to the back of their mouths to swallow. I guess the good thing about this is that he should move out of baby food pretty quickly to finger foods, and I will not have to spend so much on Gerber foods :-)

We were supposed to have a big snow storm on Sunday night; the snow didn't start until Monday and most of it fell Monday night. Even so, we only got half of what they originally predicted. I am glad, I want Spring! Snow is pretty, as long as it melts off the roads quickly, lol. I sure hope there is no snow at the end of the month, when we are loading up the moving truck!